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Kiwis rear-ended by cost of ACC claims for foreign objects up bums

Recent media coverage in the UK, showing that people sticking things up their bums is costing the NHS approximately £350,000 a year led the Taxpayers’ Union to question how much these awkward antics are costing Kiwi taxpayers and ACC levy payers.

Usually we have our eyes on how the Government is wasting taxpayers' money, however in this case taxpayers are being rear-ended by their fellow countrymen and women. Kiwi taxpayers are paying more per annum and per capita for people putting objects up their bottoms than their equivalents in Great Britain.

The Union has uncovered through the OIA that in the past five years the cost for active ACC claims related to foreign objects being inserted into anuses is about $302,660.00 excluding GST. The 2018/19 financial year was the most expensive costing $110,505.00; this is more than 2020/21, 2021/22, and the 2022/23 year to date combined. Despite the costs being higher in 2018/19, the number of individual incidents of objects in anuses was highest in 2019/20 followed by 2020/21 and 2021/22.

Unsurprisingly, with so much of the population based in Auckland, the largest number of claims came from New Zealand's largest city – 67 in total. Although in 2018/19 Canterbury saw the most claims. Manawatū-Whanganui is punching above its weight as the region with the third most numerous claims across the board. Nelson can proudly boast zero claims from 2019/20 to the present day. Taranaki had fewer than 4 claims in 2020/21 and zero cases at any other time in the past few years.

It appears Kiwis are even more kinky than our British cousins – on a per capita basis, foreign objects in places they ought not be are costing Kiwis more. In Britain, the £350,000 figure is a per annum amount derived by averaging out the spend across the years 2010-19. On a per capita basis (British population = 67.33 million) that comes to £504.97 which is NZ$963.66. The average per annum cost in New Zealand between 2017 and the current financial year to date is $50,443.00 and on a per capita basis this comes to $984.64 - even more than the Brits!

Taxpayers might be curious to find out what was happening in 2018/19 when the cost of anal insertion ACC claims adds up to more than the next three years combined. The mind boggles at what was happening down in Canterbury that same year as the largest number of cases were from incidents in that region.

What people get up to in their own time is up to them, but when their hi-jinx are hitting taxpayers in the back pocket perhaps they should reconsider their activities lest they become the butt of the country's jokes.

The OIA response, including a regional breakdown, is available here.

Reference: https://metro.co.uk/2021/11/12/people-sticking-objects-up-their-bums-costs-the-nhs350000-a-year-15589353/

*Location is based on where an accident occurred and may differ to where a client was residing at the time.

Note ACC is funded by taxpayers though ACC levies.

Showing 1 reaction

  • Nztu Media
    published this page in News 2023-01-06 10:20:31 +1300

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